>Faith even when it Hurts

>This past January, I went to the emergency room with severe stomach pain (accompanied with other not so pleasant symptoms). We were worried at the time that it was problems with my appendix and after lying around for 8 hours and accumulating a bill for (what it felt like) every person that walked by me, let alone did anything to me, I was told it was an infection. They wrote me a prescription and sent me home.

Well, since that time I have dealt with periodic pain in my stomach and this past month it has become frequent enough, and annoying enough, that I went in to see the doctor. She did blood work, urinalysis, ect. The office called me and said, it was an infection and they called in an antibiotic.

That brings us to this week. I still have pain (mild to severe stabbing pain) and this time when they check, I did not have an infection (hah!). My blood work was clean, nothing was showing up. So they wrote a referral to a specialist.

All of this is to say this: I admit that not knowing is always worse than having an answer. It scares me to know that something is not right, but the doctor can’t figure it out. But I read that when I fear and doubt, I am doubting God. When I worry, I am disobeying and demeaning God. Jesus said in Matthew, “So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32For the pagans run after all these things and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.” (Matthew 6 31-32) We are later told in Philippians “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (4:6-7)

We have an omnipotent God. He already knows what is going on and He is in complete control. I don’t know what the pain in my stomach is. I don’t like it, and God never said I have to, but he has told me to trust him with it. I trust that whatever the reason for me to endure this pain for over ½ a year will be to His glory alone and that is all that matters.


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